hallmark holiday

It may be blasphemous to say this, especially as a woman, but I have always hated Valentine's Day. Perhaps this disenchantment with the holiday materialized at a younger age when all the single ladies got to feel as if they were losers for not getting some carnation during some charity drive in high school or some gaudy bouquet in the office. In high school, one of my classmates purchased a carnation for herself to mitigate such perception; however, when it was discovered that she purchased it rather than some secret admirer - I think every single  girl has had thoughts of doing the same thing, I couldn't help but feel really hurt for her as she was being ridiculed behind her back. That is probably when I truly developed my disgust - it was always a lose-lose day.

Today is Vietnam Women's Day. While International Women's Day (see ♀♀girl power♀♀) and Vietnam Women's Day do not single out any particular group of women, it is still another holiday where the men feel the pressure to do something for the women. Anytime someone has to remind or pressure another to do something or organize the event(s) itself and have the other pay, it tends to devalue the moment for me. There were no retailer discounts, signage/banners, etc. but the women in the office did receive small tokens including a rose. Florists had additional bouquets/arrangements to purchase for the day but it was nowhere near the volume from International Women's Day. Perhaps I was the only one who thought it was odd that in Vietnam, Vietnam Women's Day was 'second fiddle'. To my dismay, it turns out that 81 years ago, a group of Vietnamese women formed an association of anti-colonialism on this very day. Somehow I thought that it was the Vietnamese version of Rosie the Riveter.

We should not need formal or (inter)national holidays to celebrate such matters as love or the special women/men in one's life. Premiums should not be placed on items because of those holidays. The novelty of these women's days have worn off on me. I gave my tokens to my executive assistant to give as her gifts to her mother (whom she had taken off for over a year to care for), who would appreciate these gestures more than I did. For me, I would trade the pricey bouquet of flowers for the equivalent number of bouquets on regular days and have a person surprise me on random days. Better yet, when there are those small moments, whether it was a smile, a habit, a look, an experience...that made you feel it, tell (or show) me you appreciate or love me.