moments that matter (part 1)

One of my team members is planning on getting engaged this year and was showing me some pictures at lunch of some Cartier settings/rings he had narrowed down. It made me think of the first time I got a ring from a guy...

I'm not sure when I realized that I didn't really have memories prior to fifth grade. Many of the "memories" I may have have come from family members and others relaying stories over the years. Yet I had this one distinct "memory" that nobody else could have known about. For a long time though, I started to think that it was something manufactured, sort of like imaginary friends (although I do have a theory on what those are and whether they are truly imaginary or visions we see when we don't put up walls). 

His name is Toby. Toby Branson. It wasn't much of memories but a memory that involved receiving a ring made of grass and weeds in second grade. By the next school year, his family had moved away. Over time, it became fleeting and not real.

In eighth grade, as our bus pulled into a Christian sleep-away camp, someone yelled out, "there's Toby Branson". For a moment I held my breath as if encountering a ghost. One of the girls from our church ended up having a huge crush on Toby. During a hike with four of us (including one of Toby's friends), she did what many girls that age are apt to do...insult me to make her look better in the eyes of her crush. Yes, I considered her a friend at that time as well. What was said is irrelevant as the point was something in line with who would want me for a girlfriend (typical small town America mentality for anyone who is a different race). I only remember the response of "I did. She was my girlfriend in second grade." He was behind me as we were climbing up some rock so my only visual that accompanied the words was her face when her jaw dropped.

We never talked about it afterwards. She just asked me if it was true and I looked at her still in shock. I did send him a letter after the camp to thank him. I never did hear from him, but I indirectly got validation that the memory was more real than not. More importantly, he could have stayed silent but for a moment in time, he made me feel like I belong(ed). For that, I will forever be thankful. I hope the character of that boy is still with the man today.