Although it was the smallest of the festivals that I have attended, it was definitely the most magical. Everywhere I looked, there were people I consider my tribe. We started with an opening ceremony and ended with a closing ceremony, setting our intentions and expanding our collective hearts.
After months of lows culminating in a walk in the darkness of the city, coming full circle to code of silence (#sue, #secretsociety123), a place I had thought I would never find myself again, I found myself struggling with the knowledge of multiple past lives with a particular soul and our purpose in this life. After many attempts at 'clean slates,' it seemed as if we had hit an impasse. Perhaps it was the energy or the love and support from our extended 'family members' or a culmination of so many 'wants' that he found himself able to 'observe' rather than 'act' (Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself - How to Lose Your Mind and Create a New One by Joe Dispenza).
I found myself connecting with people I had not connected with before although we were always in each other's orbits. Sometimes it amazes me when and who a person shares his/her vulnerable parts. While I still do not have an answer to my question, I was blessed with the magic of healing where my stories and struggles may have had an impact in others finding their answers. Then again, perhaps I did get my answer and have to be patient and appreciate the clouds before the wind blows it to show the clear blue skies.
Since setting the intention to building my tribe (pig in mud (part 5)) last summer, I have let the universe guide me in the experiences I have had and the people who I have manifested to be part of it, from healing ceremonies (blast off and a frog's kiss) to celebrations of love (sound healing and cupid's arrow). While it has not been all rainbows and unicorns, it has had been packed with personal growth, some of the most challenging in my attempt to learn unconditional love.
With Burning Man as the planned denouement, festival season started with Serenity. For a brief moment, it looked like I may not experience my first music festival but throwing caution to the wind and letting the universe guide me, the weekend ended up being a reminder that having expectations, no matter how well intended, sometimes leads to a roadblock and disappointment. Yet, it turned out to be in one aspect an opportunity to establish a sense of community that I had needed to open me up to creating my own festival wings to fly into Lightning in a Bottle (LIB).
I have been told that like Burning Man, experiences and lessons are exaggerated at music festivals. Perhaps it is the high vibrations and frequencies congregated in one place that causes the magic and synchronicities to occur. An overnight rainstorm resulted in floods, mud and soaked gear and facilities, but it did little to dampen the energy and festivities.
Being part of a vendor booth afforded me the benefits that most participants do not have access (e.g., camping location, showers, etc.). Most of us were strangers to each other but by the end of the week, we became a family of green and rainbow dragons. Some of the lessons I learned at Serenity and LIB are:
Learn to let go of material things and people. If it comes back, cherish it, but do not fret if it does not.
Do not be afraid to be one's true authentic self, even if it means being a 'lone wolf'. One will meet a new tribe and/or run into friendly faces with opportunities to reconnect on a deeper level.
Listen to the voice within and trust one's intuition, especially when it guides one to connect with someone or to go somewhere.
Be patient with one's body and mind. Sometimes setbacks happen in life...accept the cards that are dealt and practice self care.
Be present. Try new things and experiences. See the beauty in the NOW.
Skinny dipping in the reservoir, laying next to the speaker staring at the stars with the sound and vibrations of flowing through my body, seeing the vibrant lights and kaleidoscope of colors throughout the festivities, admiring the uniqueness and self expressions in everyone's costumes and sharing in the love and community are memories that I will always cherish.
San Francisco is known for its tech startups, high cost of living and aggressive homeless population. In its underbelly is a whole group of vandwellers. With the street sweepers and alternate street parking, San Francisco vandwellers naturally migrate towards areas that can house the larger vehicles, provide adequate sunlight for solar panels and does not require constant movement of their 'homes'. Given the lack of areas that would support these criteria, vandwellers have created their own community and family that support each other.
Konstantin was vandwelling when a man in a SUV stopped by him asking if he would be interested in either or both pups that the man was going to put down as neither one of them were good for fighting. Phoenix, despite his early puphood of being bred to be a fight dog, has one of the gentlest dispositions. His animal control documents in 2017 notes him as a bull mastiff mix.
His master, on the other hand, is not always law-abiding and can be a bit temperamental in certain situations. However, Konstantin has his own guiding principles and morals that he lives by, including not putting animals on a leash and not neutering them. Those who live or work in the neighborhood are familiar with this freedom-fighting duo. The mailwoman has an agreement with Konstantin that he would put Phoenix in his RV when she's on duty in the neighborhood. He has received citations for no leash in the past, and when he outright breaks laws, Konstantin fully chooses to do so with the knowledge of the cost of the consequences and pays them willingly.
San Francisco Animal Care & Control (SFACC) is based in the same neighborhood. Although they frequently cross paths, including citing the duo, in a moment of irony, the director of SFACC flagged down one of its officers to not only cite the duo but also to take Phoenix in to get neutered. San Francisco, like many cities, have passed laws to spay and neuter pit bulls or similar animals. Although this law was passed in 2006, the government has not developed a more precise way of genetically testing and/or developing clear standards on what is considered a pitbull-like animal. Instead they utilize a subjective 8-point checklist to categorize pitbulls, with a five out of eight benchmark to meet the classification. Genetic testing, even if one were to pay for it, would not suffice as there is no barometer of percentage as a gauge. Despite prior citations over the years, none of the representatives at SFACC had ever mentioned that Phoenix was at risk of not being in compliance of the 2006 law.
Rallying the community, there were not enough seats in the conference room of City Hall to fit all those who took time out of their day to show up to support Konstantin and Phoenix, with more than half having to stay out in the hall, anxiously listening through the glass door to give updates. SFACC had a veterinarian in tow. Although none of us were dog experts, we all showed up with the compassion and love for Phoenix and his plight. Some of us dressed up for the occasion, dusting off cobwebs and donning on suits from the back of closets, to counter any profiling and natural bias of vandwellers. When the court delegate said she had made her decision, some of us did not realize that we had held our breaths until we all instantaneously released heavy sighs and tears upon her saying the words 'NOT a pitbull...'.
The vaccinations and microchip that SFACC injected into Phoenix seemed like a minor exchange for keeping his balls in tact. We headed back to Phoenix's home to celebrate with champagne. Of course, although Phoenix seemed 'cool and collected' despite his ordeal, only his numerous pitstops to urinate and defecate belied his anguish over the last 24 hours. It was a great outcome for my first animal rights activism although my feet were killing me after not walking in stilettos for over a year.
Tarot cards origination started in mid 15th century as another type of recreational playing cards. Sometime in the 18th century, tarot cards took on an air of mysticism and were used for divination and occult practices. Since expanding my understanding of spirituality and New Age concepts, like astrology and numerology (trifecta), I have crossed paths with the tarot world and its magic. I used to think that a good tarot reading is primarily based on the expertise of the practitioner, yet my recent experience and understanding of energy and spirit guides including my Higher Self has taught me that the reading is personal to what resonates and based on the energy and intentions one puts into the reading. Some believe that one's first tarot deck should be gifted yet others believe that since the energy and connection to a deck is personal to an individual, the person should pick a deck that 'feels right'.
A friend hosted a Gift Practice party, whereby people could give and receive various fields or techniques that one was learning, such as yoga, Sat Nam Rasayan healing, tarot/natal chart reading, reiki, deep listening, ayurveda, zero-waste inspirations, meditation and heart-centered hugs. Although I had a specific question given the deeply personal challenges that were occupying much of my energy of late, I opted for a general reading, which turned out to be specific to my question.
While she has been gifted other decks, her preference is the Gilded Tarot, which has rich, bold colors designed by Ciro Marchetti. The simple five-card spread starts with the foundation card, which defines the reason or the topic for the reading. The middle one though identifies how the person truly feels about the topic, whether hopes or fears. The right and left ones highlight the helpful and challenging energies, respectively, while the top is the outcome or advice card.
The last month has had a lot of ups and downs, more of the latter than the former. My present and outcome were shrouded in mystery with the Moon and High Priestess. The Moon notes that not everything is as it seems and to not make hasty decisions, especially in light of my current thoughts of a broken heart, signified by the Three of Swords. With the combination of the High Priestess, I am to trust in and follow my intuition and be patient as events unfold, usually to my benefit. The Ace of Cups reminds me of my intention of experiencing unconditional love, and in the current situation, possible new beginnings based on unconditional love with emotional happiness. With the Queen of Swords in reverse though, my challenge is being caught up with the emotions from a hurt heart and wounded ego rather than approaching the situation more objectively and from a place of love.
With other readings for others and shuffles in between, his generic reading had more than a touch of synchronicity. Three of Swords is how we are both viewing and experiencing the situation. In having to address some dark demons and childhood traumas, he is experiencing change and from a Knight of Wands that jumps into situations without much thought. He has struggled with not feeling grounded, having scattered thoughts and acting impetuously throughout his life. This has led him to the Five of Swords. In the helpful position, the unethical and sneaky nature resulted in an intervention, a mirror for him to see his deceptions that has caused hurt and trauma to those in his path. With the World as his 'challenge', the hard work will pay off, with no shortcuts to be had. While he has been impatient with his 'progress', his Spirit Guides gave him a sign that with patience and hard work, he will emerge victorious as the grounded and stable King of Pentacles.
The messages were congruent with our individual QHHT as well, with mine reminding me about my intuition and heart chakra of unconditional love and his reminding him that his ego and blocked solar plexus chakra will continue to block him from answers and his life purpose until he goes deep and does the hard work. Being tuned into the energy and magic of the universe, sometimes the signs are right in front of us to remind us that we are where we are supposed to be at the exact point in time.
I have recently discovered the science behind Law of Attraction in the field of quantum physics. Some of the experiments are enough to blow one's mind, literally and figuratively. It has been an amazing journey to discover plant medicine, energy/vibrations and the Laws of the Universe.
I have been interested in hypnosis since college when someone suggested that it may be something to consider to regain significant memory lapses in my life (safe haven). Quantum hypnosis healing technique (QHHT) is an amalgamation of these concepts, and seemed like a sign from the universe and my Higher Self. Seeing that one of the books that started the practitioner's spiritual awakening was a shared experience for me (to err is human, to forgive, divine) added to the synchronicity.
While I had reservations that I was hypnotizable, I consciously decided to 'let go' of the anxiety and/or any expectations of the session. My partner's decision not to share his experience further heightened my nerves yet it was an exercise in respecting his decisions and boundaries, a lesson for me to continue to practice. It was interesting to relay my life in less than two hours and to reflect on my life journey to date, including the gratitude for even the lowest of lows, reflecting on my growth and changes in perspective from the then and now.
The practitioner had noted that with the upgrade in the collective DNA, more people are able to remember their sessions than fifty years ago when QHHT was first created. While there were moments where I doubted that I was completely under, she had signs that I was. I was surprised by the flood of tears that flowed when my Higher Self responded to the therapist's question on how I was doing in this life, as well as the words coming out of my mouth as my Higher Self answered her questions. Only later did I realize that the purple vapor that I saw swirling upwards, when channeling my Higher Self, represented the Crown Chakra, where the union with Higher Self, spirituality and higher consciousness reside.
While my partner may have initially been disappointed with his QHHT session, I believe it was exactly what he needed at the time, focusing on the doubts and blockages from his ego as well as the continuous overlapping themes of gold and yellow throughout his session, focusing on the solar plexus chakra, which also came up during his body scan. Prior to his session, the citrine quartz, which he had in a sacred necklace that he had since a sound meditation session where he was connected to his paternal lines, had disappeared from his necklace. Citrine also represents the solar plexus chakra. Gems and crystals (also known as Stone People in certain tribal cultures and spiritual teachings) have a way of coming in and going out of one's life when its energy and vibrations are needed ~ a demonstration of quantum physics.
The Crystal Movement also helps us share the energy and vibrations to help heal the collective conscious. The QHHT sessions is recorded, and it contains the vibrations from my Higher Self. Each time we replay the session, it is an opportunity to get the vibrational download from a higher source. I feel enlightened by my session and look forward to the doors that this has opened in my conscious and subconscious worlds.
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Update March 31, 2019:
I recently played my session during a time where I was looking for guidance. I fell asleep to it, hoping my subconscious would absorb the energy and vibrations. I woke up with a refreshed state of being, and a new perspective on a situation that was plaguing me.
