China's 'one child' policy along with other factors has left a significant gender gap of approximately 20-30 million for the next few decades. While the 30-year-old policy prevented approximately 400 million births, it has created an aging population with a shrinking labor force, and a gender gap caused by sex-selective abortions because of the traditional preference for boys. The government released its Outline for the Development of Chinese Children (2011-2020), which calls for gender equality and establishing penalties for doctors who are caught performing sex-selective abortions. Better late than never, right?
Despite the shortage though, the last census noted that over 500,000 women in Beijing over the age of 28 (known as shengnv or leftover women) are delaying marriage despite familial and societal pressures and taboos. While views such as "[w]hy would I marry a woman who has been 'left behind'? If she's 33 and not yet married, maybe there is something wrong with her" still represent the majority, it is refreshing to see those who defy it all to hold out for respect and love.
One of the women noted "[i]t doesn't matter what other people say, but when their parents tell them, 'You should get married, otherwise you never will. If you don't get married at 28, you are an undesirable woman,' can you imagine how that makes them feel? It's really terrible." Although I have received my fair share of such comments from family and strangers as noted in me love you long time (part 3), one of my proud moments of my mother was when I overheard my aunt ask her why I wasn't married yet and asking whether it was because I was too picky. Whether she was embarrassed or not, she didn't skip a beat in her response that I just haven't found the right person for me, and that was more important than having an 'unworthy' husband (probably not the technical translation). Of course, the question came from one of the aunts that was mentioned in me love you long time (part 6).
While the women in Ho Chi Minh City have not quite caught onto the Beijing trend, a warning to all men from an official cougar or 齐天大剩 (leftover goddess) - women, too, have choices, and one day, the gender gap will be in our favor based on simple supply and demand principles, and then we'll see who are truly the leftovers.
See Leftover Women Speak Their Heart Out for translation.
I guess it's something of relatively new phenomenon in Asia. In Indonesia, there are also an increasing number of women who are delaying marriage. So, it's something the older generations are trying to cope culturally.
ReplyDeleteBTW, my best meals are often leftovers. I usually save the best for last! :)