complementing compliments

Like many young women, I went through a phase where I was unable to take compliments. It made me extremely uncomfortable where I would divert by changing topic or do the typical Asian response by downplaying it. Perhaps it was due to insecurity, or perhaps it was due to being raised in a culture of backhanded/insulting compliments.

I have learned that some of the perceived mistrust of the individual giving the compliment stemmed from my projection of how I viewed my self. During my 20s (code of silence (#sue, #secretsociety123)) as I was trying to find positivity in my life, I had made a conscious decision to embrace compliments. At first it was with difficulty that I forced myself to hold eye contact with the person giving the compliment and saying 'thank you' rather than looking away in shame. Over time, it because automatic, and eventually, I started to believe the compliments. My mantra was that if someone can take the time to give a compliment, I should be able to take the time to be gracious about it.

Unsolicited compliments from strangers are such great surprises for me, especially when there is no ulterior motives involved. Today at the grocery store, someone walking towards me while I was perusing the yogurt section made some comment that included 'beautiful'. It did not occur to me that he was talking to me until he and two of his friends walked by me and he turned around to get my attention to make sure that I was aware that the compliment was for me. While not unique, it put a smile on my face in the simplicity of the gesture.

Once I got home, my dad called me. He had phoned much earlier in the day but since everyone knows I am not a morning person, I had assumed he 'butt dialed' me, which he does a lot for some reason. I do not talk to my parents often. We have a family group text but it's usually routine communications about sales and family get togethers that have nothing to do with me given my lack of proximity. We talk probably once every few months, at best, so it is odd that somehow my number gets 'butt dialed'. Dad likes to joke that it is his way to let me know he's thinking of me.

Usually when Dad calls rather than Mom, it is related to some task. However, today he just wanted to check on his daughter. He asked me if I was happy. He's never asked that before. It was so sweet, again in its simplicity. Later tonight, perhaps under a bit of 'Colorado high' influence, the person from fool's gold professed that he did not want to lose what we have. I am definitely learning to live in happiness every day but today is a great reminder of that.