coming out party

One of my staff had a đầy tháng celebration, which is a one-month party for a newborn. Traditional Vietnamese tend to have a newborn and the mother 'hibernate' for a month to recover while maternal relatives take care of them, either by moving in or having mother and baby move to the relative's house. In some cases, they already live together. There are very specific dietary restrictions and care. Different families have different traditions. Many of them steeped in centuries of superstitions and beliefs despite modern medicine.

Infant mortality used to be very significant - so much so that one superstition is not to name your child until the one-month mark. Despite the hot climate, one tradition would be to not run the air conditioner or fan because the 'wind' could cause illness. Some even 'burn coal' under the bed or some form of heating to keep the body warm. Certain food (including congealed blood) is prescribed to help the mother 'heal'. Rice wine or something similar is used to bathe the mother - again, the reason is to kill the bacteria. Neither can leave the house during this period and the mother is expected to stay in bed for much of the time. While many of the traditions had reasons - some valid, some not, modern medicine and hygienic conditions make them moot, the deep superstitions rooted in these traditions have caused some families to be at odds with each other.

The đầy tháng birthday celebration is usually only attended by extended family. However, small packages of xoi (sweet sticky rice) and che dau (bean dessert) are put together for others that the family wants to share blessings with or that the family believes will bring honor and luck to the baby, depending on who you ask. So when another staff brought in the package for me on behalf of the new mother, I was surprised that she thought of me, not knowing of course what it meant other than that everyone knows I have a 'wicked sweet tooth'. Although we have such celebration in the United States, there are a number of traditions that get dropped. So I was not aware of how common the packages are. On my commute home from work, I had two people ask me if it was for đầy tháng, with a knowing smile. I'm not sure if that was because it was confirmation that I would bring luck to the baby given my success or that the family especially picked me to receive extra blessings.

 

Either way, I am honored and blessed.