As I was sunbathing in the nude today, it occurred to me that either my body is growing on me or I'm growing into it. As a child, I was the 'ugly' daughter - my mother told me that I was fat and ugly. We have gotten way past any mental issues this caused and have reconciled it all. Regardless, I have always liked walking around in the buff. Given my propensity for natural light, this meant au natural for all to see, if they had wanted to. Clothing is usually one of the last items I put on when getting ready.
We, especially women, all have body parts that we can criticize. In my early 20s, it seemed as if this list couldn't get any bigger. At some point in my life, my complaints included:
- birthmark on my hand
- full lips
- big forehead
- wavy hair
- short
- small breasts
- big nipples
- flat butt
- big butt
- nails that were tough to bite
- crooked teeth
- overbite
- big nose
However, life experiences have taught me otherwise:
- The birthmark, which is now fading, taught me my right from my left.
- Who doesn't want Angelina Jolie lips? They are kissable after all.
- Either my head got bigger or my forehead got smaller - it doesn't quite seem so gargantuan.
- Wavy hair gives me the option to easily go straight or curly and gives body as hair thins with age.
- While I still wouldn't mind being a few inches taller, being petite has its advantages at times - flexibility with various positions plus I have more options with men, as most, if not all, are taller. Besides, I've been with men who are 6'3" and 6'5" so it hasn't really limited me from tall, dark and handsome. 😏
- At least I don't have to deal with back pains or droopiness as I age...plus while I have thought about enhancements, I wouldn't trade the sensitivity of these buggers any day.
- The stretch marks remind me of the 'grass is greener' syndrome of wanting a big vs. small bottom, which was all dependent on societal popularity at different points in time. It's all about proportions any way.
- I quickly gave up nail biting once I realized the effort it took. Nowadays, people insist that I have fake nails and are amazed that I would continue to cut them. Trust me, they grow back...way too fast.
- My jaw has shifted or something but my smile just adds to the youthful glow, crooked teeth and all.
- My nose allows me to get in enough air that I don't have a habit of snoring. The nostrils don't seem to be as big anymore, similar to the forehead. But in the last few years, I've been asked whether I have gotten a nose job, including from someone this past weekend, who commented that I have a pretty nose. Just shows you that beauty is in the eye of the beholder...and the part of the world you are in.
A friend recently remarked to me: I do find it interesting that you quickly characterize "a bit uneven, a little rough around the edges, slightly unrefined, and mysteriously unpredictable" as flattery. His initial comments were in relation to my personality but like my looks, I actually think uniqueness is flattery and never found 'the girl next door' as anything to hoot and holler about - wouldn't that make one less memorable?
So God, Mother Nature or whatever other higher power is out there had a better plan than I gave her credit for. She knew that like good wine, it gets better as it ages. I like when I'm tanned and at my current weight (which is the same weight as my 'freshman 15' and the highest I've ever been - things just shifted). While individually, my complaints had merit, in combination, the sum turned out to be better than its parts. My 30s taught me to be comfortable in my own skin - perhaps a bit too much. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and the only beholder that should matter is the individual looking in the mirror.
Amen!!!!
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